Chapter 28

APILGRIM,ANOUTLAW—THESPIRITDETAINED

ThecabhadnottraveledashortblockbeforeCarrie,settlingherselfandthoroughlywakinginthenightatmosphere,asked:

“What’sthematterwithhim.Ishehurtbadly.”

“Itisn’tanythingveryserious,”Hurstwoodsaidsolemnly.Hewasverymuchdisturbedoverhisownsituation,andnowthathehadCarriewithhim,heonlywantedtogetsafelyoutofreachofthelaw.Thereforehewasinnomoodforanythingsavesuchwordsaswouldfurtherhisplansdistinctly.

CarriedidnotforgetthattherewassomethingtobesettledbetweenherandHurstwood,butthethoughtwasignoredinheragitation.Theonethingwastofinishthisstrangepilgrimage.

“Whereishe.”

“WayoutontheSouthSide,”saidHurstwood.“We’llhavetotakethetrain.It’sthequickestway.”

Carriesaidnothing,andthehorsegamboledon.Theweirdnessofthecitybynightheldherattention.Shelookedatthelongrecedingrowsoflampsandstudiedthedark,silenthouses.

“Howdidhehurthimself.”sheasked—meaningwhatwasthenatureofhisinjuries.Hurstwoodunderstood.Hehatedtolieanymorethannecessary,andyethewantednoprotestsuntilhewasoutofdanger.

“Idon’tknowexactly,”hesaid.“Theyjustcalled

meuptogoandgetyouandbringyouout.Theysaidtherewasn’tanyneedforalarm,butthatIshouldn’tfailtobringyou.”

Theman’sseriousmannerconvincedCarrie,andshebecamesilent,wondering.

Hurstwoodexaminedhiswatchandurgedthemantohurry.Foroneinsodelicateapositionhewasexceedinglycool.Hecouldonlythinkofhowneedfulitwastomakethetrainandgetquietlyaway.Carrieseemedquitetractable,andhecongratulatedhimself.

Induetimetheyreachedthedepot,andafterhelpingherouthehandedthemanafive-dollarbillandhurriedon.

“Youwaithere,”hesaidtoCarrie,whentheyreachedthewaiting-room,“whileIgetthetickets.”

“HaveImuchtimetocatchthattrainforDetroit.”heaskedoftheagent.

“Fourminutes,”saidthelatter.

Hepaidfortwoticketsascircumspectlyaspossible.

“Isitfar.”saidCarrie,ashehurriedback.

“Notvery,”hesaid.“Wemustgetrightin.”

Hepushedherbeforehimatthegate,stoodbetweenherandtheticketmanwhilethelatterpunchedtheirtickets,sothatshecouldnotsee,andthenhurriedafter.

Therewasalonglineofexpressandpassengercarsandoneortwocommondaycoaches.Asthetrainhadonlyrecentlybeenmadeupandfewpassengerswereexpected,therewereonlyoneortwobrakemenwaiting.Theyenteredthereardaycoachandsatdown.Almostimmediately,“Allaboard,”resoundedfaintlyfromtheoutside,andthetrainstarted.

Carriebegantothinkitwasalittlebitcurious—thisgoingtoadepot—butsaidnothing.Thewholeincidentwassooutofthenaturalthatshedidnotattachtoomuchweighttoanythingsheimagined.

“Howhaveyoubeen.”askedHurstwoodgently,forhenowbreathedeasier.

“Verywell,”saidCarrie,whowassodisturbedthatshecouldnotbringaproperattitudetobearinthematter.ShewasstillnervoustoreachDrouetandseewhatcouldbethematter.Hurstwoodcontemplatedherandfeltthis.Hewasnotdisturbedthatitshouldbeso.Hedidnottroublebecauseshewasmovedsympatheticallyinthematter.Itwasoneofthequalitiesinherwhichpleasedhimexceedingly.Hewasonlythinkinghowheshouldexplain.Eventhiswasnotthemostseriousthinginhismind,however.Hisowndeedandpresentflightwerethegreatshadowswhichweigheduponhim.

“WhatafoolIwastodothat,”hesaidoverandover.“Whatamistake!”

Inhissobersenses,hecouldscarcelyrealizethatthethinghadbeendone.Hecouldnotbegintofeelthathewasafugitivefromjustice.Hehadoftenreadofsuchthings,andhadthoughttheymustbeterrible,butnowthatthethingwasuponhim,heonlysatandlookedintothepast.ThefuturewasathingwhichconcernedtheCanadianline.Hewantedtoreachthat.Asfortheresthesurveyedhisactionsfortheevening,andcountedthempartsofagreatmistake.

“Still,”hesaid,“whatcouldIhavedone.”

Thenhewoulddecidetomakethebestofit,andwouldbegintodosobystartingthewholeinquiryoveragain.Itwasafruitless,harassinground,andlefthiminaqueermoodtodealwiththepropositionhehadinthepresenceofCarrie.

Thetrainclackedthroughtheyardsalongthelakefront,andranratherslowlytoTwenty-fourthStreet.Brakesandsignalswerevisiblewithout.Theenginegaveshortcallswithitswhistle,andfrequentlythebellrang.Severalbrakemencamethrough,bearinglanterns.Theywerelockingthevestibulesandputtingthecarsinorderforalongrun.

Presentlyitbegantogainspeed,andCarriesawthesilentstreetsflashingbyinrapidsuccession.The

enginealsobeganitswhistle-callsoffourparts,withwhichitsignaleddangertoimportantcrossings.

“Isitveryfar.”askedCarrie.“Notsovery,”saidHurstwood.Hecouldhardlyrepressasmileathersimplicity.Hewantedtoexplainandconciliateher,buthealsowantedtobewelloutofChicago.

Inthelapseofanotherhalf-houritbecameapparenttoCarriethatitwasquitearuntowhereverhewastakingher,anyhow.

“IsitinChicago.”sheaskednervously.Theywerenowfarbeyondthecitylimits,andthetrainwasscuddingacrosstheIndianalineatagreatrate.

“No,”hesaid,“notwherewearegoing.”

Therewassomethinginthewayhesaidthiswhicharousedherinaninstant.

Herprettybrowbegantocontract.

“WearegoingtoseeCharlie,aren’twe.”sheasked.

Hefeltthatthetimewasup.Anexplanationmightaswellcomenowaslater.Therefore,heshookhisheadinthemostgentlenegative.

“What.”saidCarrie.Shewasnonplussedatthepossibilityoftheerrandbeingdifferentfromwhatshehadthought.

Heonlylookedatherinthemostkindlyandmollifyingway.

“Well,whereareyoutakingme,then.”sheasked,hervoiceshowingthequalityoffright.

“I’lltellyou,Carrie,ifyou’llbequiet.Iwantyoutocomealongwithmetoanothercity,”

“Oh,”saidCarrie,hervoicerisingintoaweakcry.“Letmeoff.Idon’twanttogowithyou.”

Shewasquiteappalledattheman’saudacity.Thiswassomethingwhichhadneverforamomententeredherhead.Heronethoughtnowwastogetoffandaway.Ifonlytheflyingtraincouldbestopped,theterribletrickwouldbeamended.

Shearoseandtriedtopushoutintotheaisle—anywhere.Sheknewshehadtodosomething.

Hurstwoodlaidagentlehandonher.

“Sitstill,Carrie,”hesaid.“Sitstill.Itwon’tdoyouanygoodtogetuphere.ListentomeandI’lltellyouwhatI’lldo.Waitamoment.”

Shewaspushingathisknees,butheonlypulledherback.Noonesawthislittlealtercation,forveryfewpersonswereinthecar,andtheywereattemptingtodoze.

“Iwon’t,”saidCarrie,whowas,nevertheless,complyingagainstherwill.“Letmego,”shesaid.“Howdareyou.”andlargetearsbegantogatherinhereyes.

Hurstwoodwasnowfullyarousedtotheimmediatedifficulty,andceasedtothinkofhisownsituation.Hemustdosomethingwiththisgirl,orshewouldcausehimtrouble.Hetriedtheartofpersuasionwithallhispowersaroused.

“Lookherenow,Carrie,”hesaid,“youmustn’tactthisway.Ididn’tmeantohurtyourfeelings.Idon’twanttodoanythingtomakeyoufeelbad.”

“Oh,”sobbedCarrie,“oh,oh—oo—o!”

“There,there,”hesaid,“youmustn’tcry.Won’tyoulistentome.Listentomeaminute,andI’lltellyouwhyIcametodothisthing.Icouldn’thelpit.IassureyouIcouldn’t.Won’tyoulisten.”

Hersobsdisturbedhimsothathewasquitesureshedidnothearawordhesaid.

“Won’tyoulisten.”heasked.

“No,Iwon’t,”saidCarrie,flashingup.“Iwantyoutotakemeoutofthis,orI’lltelltheconductor.Iwon’tgowithyou.It’sashame,”andagainsobsoffrightcutoffherdesireforexpression.

Hurstwoodlistenedwithsomeastonishment.Hefeltthatshehadjustcauseforfeelingasshedid,andyethewishedthathecouldstraightenthisthingoutquickly.Shortlytheconductorwouldcomethroughforthetickets.Hewantednonoise,notroubleofanykind.Beforeeverythinghemustmakeherquiet.

“Youcouldn’tgetoutuntilthetrainstopsagain,”saidHurstwood.“Itwon’tbeverylonguntilwereachanotherstation.Youcangetoutthenifyouwantto.Iwon’tstopyou.AllIwantyoutodoistolistenamoment.You’llletmetellyou,won’tyou.”

Carrieseemednottolisten.Sheonlyturnedherheadtowardthewindow,whereoutsideallwasblack.Thetrainwasspeedingwithsteadygraceacrossthefieldsandthroughpatchesofwood.Thelongwhistlescamewithsad,musicaleffectasthelonelywoodlandcrossingswereapproached.

NowtheconductorenteredthecarandtookuptheoneortwofaresthathadbeenaddedatChicago.HeapproachedHurstwood,whohandedoutthetickets.Poisedasshewastoact,Carriemadenomove.Shedidnotlookabout.

WhentheconductorhadgoneagainHurstwoodfeltrelieved.

“You’reangryatmebecauseIdeceivedyou,”hesaid.“Ididn’tmeanto,Carrie.AsIliveIdidn’t.Icouldn’thelpit.Icouldn’tstayawayfromyouafterthefirsttimeIsawyou.”

Hewasignoringthelastdeceptionassomethingthatmightgobytheboard.Hewantedtoconvinceherthathiswifecouldnolongerbeafactorintheirrelationship.Themoneyhehadstolenhetriedtoshutoutofhismind.

“Don’ttalktome,”saidCarrie,“Ihateyou.Iwantyoutogoawayfromme.Iamgoingtogetoutattheverynextstation.”

Shewasinatrembleofexcitementandoppositionasshespoke.

“Allright,”hesaid,“butyou’llhearmeout,won’tyou.Afterallyouhavesaidaboutlovingme,youmighthearme.Idon’twanttodoyouanyharm.I’llgiveyouthemoneytogobackwithwhenyougo.Imerelywanttotellyou,Carrie.Youcan’tstopmefromlovingyou,whateveryoumaythink.”

Helookedathertenderly,butreceivednoreply.“YouthinkIhavedeceivedyoubadly,butIhaven’t.Ididn’tdoitwillingly.I’mthroughwithmywife.Shehasn’tanyclaimsonme.I’llneverseeheranymore.That’swhyI’mheretonight.That’swhyIcameandgotyou.”

“YousaidCharliewashurt,”saidCarrie,savagely.“Youdeceivedme.You’vebeendeceivingmeallthetime,andnowyouwanttoforcemetorunawaywithyou.”

Shewassoexcitedthatshegotupandtriedtogetbyhimagain.Helether,andshetookanotherseat.Thenhefollowed.

“Don’trunawayfromme,Carrie,”hesaidgently.“Letmeexplain.IfyouwillonlyhearmeoutyouwillseewhereIstand.Itellyoumywifeisnothingtome.Shehasn’tbeenanythingforyearsorIwouldn’thaveevercomenearyou.I’mgoingtogetadivorcejustassoonasIcan.I’llneverseeheragain.I’mdonewithallthat.You’retheonlypersonIwant.IfIcanhaveyouIwon’teverthinkofanotherwomanagain.”

Carrieheardallthisinaveryruffledstate.Itsoundedsincereenough,however,despiteallhehaddone.TherewasatensenessinHurstwood’svoiceandmannerwhichcouldbuthavesomeeffect.Shedidnotwantanythingtodowithhim.Hewasmarried,hehaddeceivedheronce,andnowagain,andshethoughthimterrible.Stillthereissomethinginsuchdaringandpowerwhichisfascinatingtoawoman,especiallyifshecanbemadetofeelthatitisallpromptedbyloveofher.

Theprogressofthetrainwashavingagreatdealtodowiththesolutionofthisdifficultsituation.ThespeedingwheelsanddisappearingcountryputChicagofartherandfartherbehind.Carriecouldfeelthatshewasbeingbornealongdistanceoff-thattheenginewasmakinganalmostthroughruntosomedistantcity.Shefeltattimesasifshecouldcryoutandmake

sucharowthatsomeonewouldcometoheraid;atothertimesitseemedanalmostuselessthing—sofarwasshefromanyaid,nomatterwhatshedid.AllthewhileHurstwoodwasendeavoringtoformulatehispleainsuchawaythatitwouldstrikehomeandbringherintosympathywithhim.

“IwassimplyputwhereIdidn’tknowwhatelsetodo.”

Carriedeignednosuggestionofhearingthis.

“WhenIsayyouwouldn’tcomeunlessIcouldmarryyou,Idecidedtoputeverythingelsebehindmeandgetyoutocomeawaywithme.I’mgoingoffnowtoanothercity.IwanttogotoMontrealforawhile,andthenanywhereyouwantto.We’llgoandliveinNewYork,ifyousay.”

“I’llnothaveanythingtodowithyou,”saidCarrie.“Iwanttogetoffthistrain.Wherearewegoing.”

“ToDetroit,”saidHurstwood.

“Oh!”saidCarrie,inaburstofanguish.Sodistantanddefiniteapointseemedtoincreasethedifficulty.

“Won’tyoucomealongwithme.”hesaid,asiftherewasgreatdangerthatshewouldnot.“Youwon’tneedtodoanythingbuttravelwithme.I’llnottroubleyouinanyway.YoucanseeMontrealandNewYork,andthenifyoudon’twanttostayyoucangoback.Itwillbebetterthantryingtogobackto-night.”

ThefirstgleamoffairnessshoneinthispropositionforCarrie.Itseemedaplausiblethingtodo,muchasshefearedhisoppositionifshetriedtocarryitout.MontrealandNewYork!Evennowshewasspeedingtowardthosegreat,strangelands,andcouldseethemifsheliked.Shethought,butmadenosign.

Hurstwoodthoughthesawashadeofcomplianceinthis.Heredoubledhisardor.

“Think,”hesaid,“whatI’vegivenup.Ican’tgobacktoChicagoanymore.I’vegottostayawayandlivealonenow,ifyoudon’tcomewithme.Youwon’t

gobackonmeentirely,willyou,Carrie.”

“Idon’twantyoutotalktome,”sheansweredforcibly.

Hurstwoodkeptsilentforawhile.

Carriefeltthetraintobeslowingdown.Itwasthemomenttoactifshewastoactatall.Shestirreduneasily.

“Don’tthinkofgoing,Carrie,”hesaid.“Ifyouevercaredformeatall,comealongandlet’sstartright.I’lldowhateveryousay.I’llmarryyou,orI’llletyougoback.Giveyourselftimetothinkitover.Iwouldn’thavewantedyoutocomeifIhadn’tlovedyou.Itellyou,Carrie,beforeGod,Ican’tlivewithoutyou.Iwon’t!”

Therewasthetensityoffiercenessintheman’spleawhichappealeddeeplytohersympathies.Itwasadissolvingfirewhichwasactuatinghimnow.Hewaslovinghertoointenselytothinkofgivingherupinthis,hishourofdistress.Heclutchedherhandnervouslyandpresseditwithalltheforceofanappeal.

Thetrainwasnowallbutstopped.Itwasrunningbysomecarsonasidetrack.Everythingoutsidewasdarkanddreary.Afewsprinklesonthewindowbegantoindicatethatitwasraining.Carriehunginaquandary,balancingbetweendecisionandhelplessness.Nowthetrainstopped,andshewaslisteningtohisplea.Theenginebackedafewfeetandallwasstill.

Shewavered,totallyunabletomakeamove.Minuteafterminuteslippedbyandstillshehesitated,hepleading.

“WillyouletmecomebackifIwantto.”sheasked,asifshenowhadtheupperhandandhercompanionwasutterlysubdued.

“Ofcourse,”heanswered,“youknowIwill.”

Carrieonlylistenedasonewhohasgrantedatemporaryamnesty.Shebegantofeelasifthematterwereinherhandsentirely.

Thetrainwasagaininrapidmotion.Hurstwoodchangedthesubject.

“Aren’tyouverytired.”hesaid.

“No,”sheanswered.

“Won’tyouletmegetyouaberthinthesleeper.”

Sheshookherhead,thoughforallherdistressandhistrickeryshewasbeginningtonoticewhatshehadalwaysfelt—histhoughtfulness.

“Oh,yes,”hesaid,“youwillfeelsomuchbetter.”

Sheshookherhead.

“Letmefixmycoatforyou,anyway,”andhearoseandarrangedhislightcoatinacomfortablepositiontoreceiveherhead.

“There,”hesaidtenderly,“nowseeifyoucan’trestalittle.”Hecouldhavekissedherforhercompliance.Hetookhisseatbesideherandthoughtamoment.

“Ibelievewe’reinforaheavyrain,”hesaid.

“Soitlooks,”saidCarrie,whosenerveswerequietingunderthesoundoftheraindrops,drivenbyagustywind,asthetrainsweptonfranticallythroughtheshadowtoanewerworld.

ThefactthathehadinameasuremollifiedCarriewasasourceofsatisfactiontoHurstwood,butitfurnishedonlythemosttemporaryrelief.Nowthatheroppositionwasoutoftheway,hehadallofhistimetodevotetotheconsiderationofhisownerror.

Hisconditionwasbitterintheextreme,forhedidnotwantthemiserablesumhehadstolen.Hedidnotwanttobeathief.Thatsumoranyothercouldnevercompensateforthestatewhichhehadthusfoolishlydoffed.Itcouldnotgivehimbackhishostoffriends,hisname,hishouseandfamily,norCarrie,ashehadmeanttohaveher.HewasshutoutfromChicago—fromhiseasy,comfortablestate.Hehadrobbedhimselfofhisdignity,hismerrymeetings,hispleasantevenings.Andforwhat.Themorehethoughtofitthemoreunbearableitbecame.Hebegantothinkthathewouldtryandrestorehimselftohisoldstate.He

wouldreturnthemiserablethievingsofthenightandexplain.PerhapsMoywouldunderstand.Perhapstheywouldforgivehimandlethimcomeback.

BynoontimethetrainrolledintoDetroitandhebegantofeelexceedinglynervous.Thepolicemustbeonhistrackbynow.Theyhadprobablynotifiedallthepoliceofthebigcities,anddetectiveswouldbewatchingforhim.Herememberedinstancesinwhichdefaultershadbeencaptured.Consequently,hebreathedheavilyandpaledsomewhat.Hishandsfeltasiftheymusthavesomethingtodo.Hesimulatedinterestinseveralsceneswithoutwhichhedidnotfeel.Herepeatedlybeathisfootuponthefloor.

Carrienoticedhisagitation,butsaidnothing.Shehadnoideawhatitmeantorthatitwasimportant.

HewonderednowwhyhehadnotaskedwhetherthistrainwentonthroughtoMontrealorsomeCanadianpoint.Perhapshecouldhavesavedtime.Hejumpedupandsoughttheconductor.

“DoesanypartofthistraingotoMontreal.”heasked.

“Yes,thenextsleeperbackdoes.”

Hewouldhaveaskedmore,butitdidnotseemwise,sohedecidedtoinquireatthedepot.

Thetrainrolledintotheyards,clangingandpuffing.

“IthinkwehadbettergorightonthroughtoMontreal,”hesaidtoCarrie.“I’llseewhattheconnectionsarewhenwegetoff.”

Hewasexceedinglynervous,butdidhisbesttoputonacalmexterior.Carrieonlylookedathimwithlarge,troubledeyes.Shewasdriftingmentally,unabletosaytoherselfwhattodo.

ThetrainstoppedandHurstwoodledthewayout.Helookedwarilyaroundhim,pretendingtolookafterCarrie.Seeingnothingthatindicatedstudiedobservation,hemadehiswaytotheticketoffice.

“ThenexttrainforMontrealleaveswhen.”heasked.

“Intwentyminutes,”saidtheman.

HeboughttwoticketsandPullmanberths.ThenhehastenedbacktoCarrie.

“Wegorightoutagain,”hesaid,scarcelynoticingthatCarrielookedtiredandweary.

“IwishIwasoutofallthis,”sheexclaimedgloomily.

“You’llfeelbetterwhenwereachMontreal,”hesaid.

“Ihaven’tanearthlythingwithme,”saidCarrie;“notevenahandkerchief.”

“Youcanbuyallyouwantassoonasyougetthere,dearest,”heexplained.“Youcancallinadressmaker.”

Nowthecriercalledthetrainreadyandtheygoton.Hurstwoodbreathedasighofreliefasitstarted.Therewasashortruntotheriver,andtheretheywereferriedover.Theyhadbarelypulledthetrainofftheferry-boatwhenhesettledbackwithasigh.

“Itwon’tbesoverylongnow,”hesaid,rememberingherinhisrelief.“Wegettherethefirstthinginthemorning.”

Carriescarcelydeignedtoreply.

“I’llseeifthereisadining-car,”headded.“I’mhungry.”